When a teen chooses negative behavior, peer pressure is often cited as one of the contributing factors. But the social pressure kids feel from other kids can support positive conduct, as well. The same principles that impact negative peer pressure apply.
Group Rules and Norms
Teens yearn to fit in. Once a social group has established its rules and norms, teens will usually go to great lengths to stick with them. At the negative extreme, this can mean experimenting with drugs, alcohol, sex, or criminal activity to feel accepted in a group. But kids will also adopt pro-social behaviors and attitudes when subtle pressures from the dominant peer group encourages them to do so.
The Influence of the Bystander
Kids often forget that even those kids who are not directly involved in negative behavior have much influence on whether that behavior escalates or decreases. Often, teens misbehave because they are looking for attention, approval or some other reaction from other kids. For example, kids can choose to watch or talk about an incident, providing the wanted attention and reinforcement.
Opportunities for Power
Teens have a lot of outside forces controlling their lives. Parents, teachers, and other authorities are constantly telling them what to do. This can leave many teens feeling powerless. When a child’s life feels out of control, one of his primary needs may be to establish a sense of power over something else. In extreme cases, this can take the form of bullying, criminal activity, disrespecting authorities, eating disorders, and other troubling behaviors. By providing kids with opportunities to feel a sense of control in positive ways, we help eliminate their need to establish it in ways that are unhealthy and socially unacceptable.
What Can You Do?
- Let kids help decide the rules. Kids are more likely to buy in when they have a say in the rules and consequences of your program. Ownership also helps to cultivate responsibility.
- Develop a sense of community. Teach teens to work with, not against each other. Success should never come at the expense of another. Instead, make achievements a group effort. This will encourage kids to help and support each other.
- Recognize individual abilities. Each child has unique gifts, but they may go unnoticed in settings that focus almost exclusively on activities such as academics or athletics. Be sure to help facilitate each kid’s contribution to the group. When they feel good about themselves, they are more able to help each other to make positive choices.
With your help, kids can develop pride in a community that incorporates group decision-making and youth leadership. Help teens learn to feel good about themselves and their contributions, and they will encourage each other to make good choices,
